Image by Lawrence OP via FlickrIf someone had told me a year ago at this time that my Mom would pass away and my Dad would remarry in the next year, I simply would have wanted to go and bury my head in the sand. It would have been more than I could possibly have imagined. And, that is exactly why, as christians, we must depend on Him everyday for the strength to face another day. We do not know what each new day will bring and the Lord knew that was the only way for it to be. If we knew what the future held, we would not need to depend on Him. Well, one thing for sure, I've had a great lesson in that the past year and I can truthfully and honestly say that He has once again, proven Himself faithful to me. Just as the 23rd Psalm says, He has led me beside still waters, and He has restored my soul and He hasn't just done it once, He has done it continously.
Grief is so strange and having never felt the kind of grief that I have felt since Mom's death, I had no idea what to expect. But, I do know that I would not have imagined it taking so long to get through it. Now, I do not sit around and cry continously or go and sit at her grave. Yes, I have cried many a tear and I have certainly visited her grave a few times. Not a day has passed that I have not thought of her and I just never know when something is going to spark a memory of her. I have definitely experienced healing, but still have more to do and I will not be concerned with how long it may take. There are no set time tables, it varies from individual to individual.
My Dad has been keeping the company of a wonderful woman in recent weeks and this week he proposed to her and they will be married at some point in the near future. I knew from the very beginning that there was something very special between them and knew that marriage was a real possiblity. But, knowing something with your head and accepting it with your heart is so different. This week, when Daddy shared with me that they would be married, my heart hurt so badly I thought I couldn't stand it. I didn't understand that at first and felt very badly feeling that way. Why would my heart hurt, I am so happy for the two of them and I could not have "hand picked" anyone for my Dad any better. She is such a lovely lady, and I know that she and I are going to share a very special relationship. And, she is not a replacement for my Mother, she is someone for my Dad to enjoy the rest of his life with. Yes, it has been a very emotional time and I have come to the conclusion that what I feel is very normal. And, that makes me feel better.
Image via Wikipedia
Something I read this week stated that we cannot put grief in a time frame. I thankful that I do have to because HE continues to support and comfort me as I lean on Him.